The Value of a Holiday
May 17th, 2012 § Leave a Comment
- photo by Jasjit Rai
Me near one of my favourite beaches on the Big Island.
While I enjoy being near an ocean, the roar and jubilance of the waves in Hawaii is magnificent. The island is alive and it makes it presence known. My desire to return to the Big Island was in part due to its constant display of power, a reminder of the insignificance of so much that can occupy my mind. It’s difficult to hold a weak or meaningless thought when you can feel the primal earth around you and under you. The colours, sounds, scents, and ever-changing terrain demand attention. The exotic flowers growing everywhere expect to be noticed. The birds love singing their song. And the volcano flows its lava.
My most calming experience, in heart and mind, was watching the giant sea turtles wading in the waves. I felt that sitting there for a few days would have alleviated all tension and returned me to my heart and soul’s gentle whispers. Alas, this realization only came near the end of my trip!
There were two sea turtles who hung out at my favourite morning spot. Talk about going with the flow…they just seem to waft in and up with the water. They knew they couldn’t be in charge (the waves being not so gentle), so their bodies were tossed about. They showed no resistance, only harmony. Occasionally a flipper would pop out when they needed to regain their balance. And when they’d had enough, they could go inside their shells for time alone, to focus within while the life without did its own thing. This level of peace was truly humbling.
I remind myself that I have the joy of returning to these friends in my memory. Watching them move as they do is a sensation I can feel and all I need to do is close my eyes.
The strangest part of coming home is being indoors so much. Living, eating, and being outdoors in beautiful weather is a true luxury. Such an experience changes us. We are positively weathered by the sun and wind and cannot hold onto the stuff that seems to stick to us through city life. A realness emerges. Food tastes better. Sleep comes more easily at night. And we breathe freely, no longer contained but open to the world. Thank you Hawaii. What an incredible jewel, not too too far from home.
The jubilant waves of Hawaii!
Nia Fitness and the Joy of Movement
April 23rd, 2012 § Leave a Comment
Free Nia Class
Creekside Community Centre
Wed, Apr 25, 12 – 1
Spring Nia classes have begun at the Scotiabank Dance Centre and the Roundhouse Community Centre, however you can still join in and get your groove on! The Creekside class is launching this week with a free opportunity for you to try it out and experience fitness in a fun, low-stress way.
Fitness, for me, has always been something best enjoyed with others. Doing it alone has never been motivating and I gave up in those situations in the past. But when I find a great teacher, class atmosphere, or potential workout friends, I find myself heading to energize my body with far less resistance. As a teacher, I also love connecting with students who are willing to commit to their health and have fun doing it. So I encourage you to bring people along or come and make new friends. Nia seems to naturally draw people who are open and willing to connect. It doesn’t mean you have to be best friends (although I’ve made a few wonderful ones along the way), just that it’s possible and can turn out to be a treat working out with a like-minded lot.
I have also taught Nia to many groups at events or organizational team building sessions. The smiles and laughter always come out and help people relax and find their joy. It may seem like it would be intimidating to do with colleagues, however having experience in organizational development has helped me facilitate in a way that creates a safe, fun, and playful environment that brings out people’s best. I love these occasions. Work can be stressful and challenging, so doing something fun with co-workers can really help you let go, break down unnecessary walls, and return to being in the moment in a human and joyful way. I have consistently found that when I taught Nia as part of an organizational program, people took the time to mention it in their feedback forms and share how valuable and energizing it was. It regularly stands out above the rest.
You can join any one of the three classes I have going on or buy a flexi-pass that allows you to attend classes at all three venues. Come on, try something new and dare to have more fun while getting a physical workout that invites play, laughter, and expression along with the usual benefits of a well-rounded fitness practice. It’s here for you.
Dreaming through the World Wide Web
March 20th, 2012 § Leave a Comment
So much is at our fingertips these days, it’s enough to forget how recent a phenomenon this is…and…that it contains power. Admittedly, I take much time to jump on any bandwagon that requires technology. In fact, I avoided surfing the net for years. I only got hooked just over a year ago (fortunately still a mild case compared to most).
My search was for reading material, one of my favourite pastimes, and it was too late to go to the library (why aren’t they open 24/7?) or a bookstore. Desperate to read what I wanted, I searched on the web and, lo and behold, found people writing what I like to read!
Prior to that, I’d been afraid that the worldwide web would keep me from real life and I’d lose countless hours as countless internet addicts had claimed. Eventually, though, my need to find what I wanted pushed me in.
I was amazed. I could access what I wanted late at night when the world around me was asleep and I finally had downtime! Now, that was worthwhile. So my journey began. For some time, I limited my forays to desires for knowledge, when it was too late to make a phone call or physically go in search of what I wanted.
However one year ago, for the first time, I accessed the internet for escape. I was awfully stressed and couldn’t find my way out of my thoughts and feelings. Desperate to change my state, a thought occurred to use the internet to dream. So I began googling one of my interests, simply to divert my thinking and play the “what if” game. (I love the “what if” game, always have. What if I had oodles of money? What if I could travel the world? What if I could do anything I wanted?)
My eyes landed on a page. My heart stopped pounding. Everything inside of me relaxed. My eyes softened and got a little wet. I breathed in the page for at least half an hour. I felt hope. I felt love. I let it nourish me. I let it feed me. I didn’t even want to blink. I felt safe again, knowing that my dreams could come true and there were other people who wanted to play in a similar world and who had already created it. I could choose what I wanted.
What was I looking at? The details aren’t important in this story at this time. What I will tell you was that the photographs included creatively designed buildings (I love design). One space was all pink and orange inside, the two colours I love together more than any other combination. So there I sat, staring at them and thinking that there was someone who designed this place and there are people who work in it today, loving things I love (not only back in the 60s in some psychedelic bus). It exists now! And it was beautiful, happy, and deliciously playful. It saved me.
This trip brought me back to dreaming my life at a moment when I had gotten lost in some dark place, having forgotten the possibilities available. I didn’t need to be there or take any action in that moment. I just wanted to sit with it, knowing it existed. But, as things happen when we locate our love, our meaning, our desire, a few months later, I actually went to one of the places on that site. The trip came about quite last minute without any planning (and was paid for by a dear person since I didn’t have the funds at the time). That is manifestation!
Do you need to get lost in something you deeply love? Have you lost your lust for life? Do you need to remember what moves you? Do you need to release stress and surrender to your heart’s deepest desires? The journey can begin at your fingertips.
Often when we’re in the state I described, we don’t have the energy to take any big action. Our mind might be fuzzy, our body moping, our emotions sullen and our spirit forgotten. A tiny step may be all that we can muster. This tiny step is profound, for it can change everything. It helps us take our power back from where we misplaced it.
The worldwide web is a tool, one that can be wasted or one that can be harnessed to help us create.
The web allows us to prepare, to get ready emotionally and mentally, before any action need be taken. Some dreams are scary because we want them so much and we barely dare thinking about them for the fear of them coming true. The web allows you to sit with your vision, plan it out, look at pictures of it, read about it, and imagine yourself there, all the while, sitting on your favourite sofa. Take action or don’t take action, but do revel in your dreams. Imagination is powerful. It is the spark that lights the fire and creates energy. It is so necessary in today’s world. It is necessary in your life as it is in mine. It is the way forward.
Now, don’t be surprised if you end up smack dab in the middle of your dreams through this process – whether you proceed innocently or intentionally. Just be playful and your guidance will arrive with incredible ease, as will the miracles and fulfillment.
Doing Some Nothing
February 28th, 2012 § Leave a Comment
This week I’d like to share a blogpost by a favourite author of mine that I feel everyone could benefit from immensely. Martha Beck, Life Coach and Author, explains the concept of “doing nothing” in her most recent post.
Click here to read it.
I completely understand when she describes how much we all want to do nothing for a while (i.e. have a break), yet how absolutely resistant we can be to going through with it, even for ten minutes. I challenge you to begin this as a daily ritual. I have.
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A couple of years ago, I led a weekly relaxation class over six weeks. The time was spent practicing different forms of relaxation (meditation, stretching, visualization, muscle relaxation). I put it on upon hearing that some of my Nia students felt they were lacking it in their lives, and realizing that I was feeling the same. I was sure this class was going to be popular, after all I was giving them what they said they desperately needed!
Five students was the largest number that showed up for any one class. Usually it was three.
It turned out that many of those who originally expressed interest told me that they didn’t have the time to attend (the most common excuse in any path towards greater health, exercise or well-being by the way). In other words their lives were too busy to relax and they weren’t really ready to change that even though they had asked for it.
This is not uncommon. No matter how much we all want things, most of the time we’re not prepared to do what it takes. Reading Martha Beck’s blogpost may inspire you to sit in emptiness every day for a short while and see where it takes you. You may find that any resistance which is in the way of your highest priorities will simply begin to melt away.
And it’s amazing how much fullness you will feel by sitting through the emptiness.
Be on the Lookout for What You Want
February 7th, 2012 § Leave a Comment
It is all too easy to push through life hoping to make it to the next moment of happiness, peace, love, excitement, adventure or whatever else strikes your fancy. Such a journey is drained of real life, for it’s too focused on an imagined experience. Real life happens when you breathe, look around, see, feel, engage, and make yourself the centre point of all that is your life. We all forget this all too easily though. And it can seem like it’ll take the strength of a hundred horses to pull us into the present. That’s where the riches lie, making them fuel for the dreams we envision.
With a current schedule that feels hectic at times, my life has been getting a little blurry. And so, I am reminded to pause often, look around, notice what I see. When there is so much filling my mind, even this ‘looking around’ can feel like it takes too much energy. So, I’ve been thinking, why not look for something specific? When one does that, things slow down and attention gets focused sharply. This is a form of mindfulness. All else drops away and the mind is refreshed by having the luxury of seeking only one thing in our over-stimulated world.
What might you look for? How about a feeling you desire? Be a sleuth and discover every moment of happiness you experience in a day, from having a mesmerizing dream, to sipping your favourite liquid, to stepping into a puddle of sunshine. Maybe it is adventure you seek? Go down new streets, venture into shops you wouldn’t normally consider, talk to strangers. It could be love, playfulness, mystery, luxury, magic and so on. The key is to bask in the feeling now and notice all the clues that show you it is already in your life. This makes it far easier to accept more!
Spend the coming week doing this and keep a diary of your results. The repetition will uncover the feeling inside you. Breathe it in, or see it pouring out of your eyes into your world.
You may discover that your simple focus reminds you of the bounty that surrounds you every day.
Knowing Thyself Leads to Success and Fulfillment
February 1st, 2012 § Leave a Comment
When was the last time you completed a self-assessment questionnaire or test? Most people first come across one in high school when they’re exploring what to do with the rest of their lives out in the “real” world. Many never do another one, unless they find themselves looking for a new career and end up having the fortune of talking to a career counsellor (important note: only trust career counsellors who are living or moving closer to their true dreams!). Believe me, it’s way better doing a career assessment as an adult when you have more of a clue about who you are and will be less swayed by the opinions of others.
Going through a self-assessment is something I highly recommend doing every few years.
All of us change over time. Even if we hold similar interests, we grow and learn and come closer to our real preferences and desires. As we develop into adulthood, we are are doing fewer things because we’re supposed to and more things because we want to.
Career assessments provide valuable information on who you are: your skills, interests, preferences, personality and abilities. While many things may appear obvious to you, I am certain you will be pleasantly surprised when you go through this process thoroughly.
The surprise could be a result of discovery things about yourself that you didn’t realize (i.e. I do like math!) or prove to be an affirmation of who you know yourself to be (i.e. I am an artist!). The former could give you confidence to use more of a skill you may have taken for granted to help build your dreams. The latter can offer the encouragement you need to remain committed to your heart’s desire. Or if you’ve really been ignoring your own soul and its gifts, the assessment may show you in black and white that you’re destined to go where your heart can sing. Either way, a full assessment will enhance your career and life by the insight it offers.
I recently went through the Holland Codes, a questionnaire I hadn’t done for years. While I could’ve predicted the general result without doing the questionnaire, the formal process made it so much clearer and more powerful. In the order of their prevalence, my three main codes currently are: Artistic, Enterprising, and Social. What it did for me was affirm that I’m on the right track. I felt good, knowing that I am using many of my top skills and attributes in my work life. They are also reflected in Joi Works, my company, and its services. Living by your DNA cannot help but lead you to success.
What was new as I did the questionnaire this time round was that the artistic piece is now a frontrunner. This was not the case 10 or 20 years ago. It may have been a mere dream, and not one that I would’ve owned, since I’d done little skill building in this area at the time. So I am delighted, knowing that what I feel in my heart and soul is echoed by this rational, methodical test. It gave me back my personal power.
Over the years I have had a wonderful array of potential careers according to the tests I’ve done including: clergy (spirit is of prime importance to me), designer/artist – fashion/graphic/industrial (a path begun, but much more I’d still love to do), career counselor (done it and doing it), public speaker and writer (done it and doing it), director (often been a leader/teacher)…and a few more that make my heart sing.
So, is it time for you to do a self-assessment? Go for it. It’s more fun, fruitful, empowering, and accurate than reading the daily horoscope! It will give you a level of clarity and confidence that you may have forgotten is within your own power. If you’d like my assessment services, go to the career coaching page at Career Joi and book a session. Get ready to reignite excitement for your life.
Know thyself and let it lead you to a life of true fulfillment and meaning.
Feeling January Joys or Blues?
January 23rd, 2012 § 4 Comments
The elation of having a brand new year, to carve my path through, is usually my January delight. This year, I’ve had little time to immerse myself in that experience and am finding myself a little blue as we come into the final stretch of the month. Yes, I did say that I wanted to “fly out of the gate” after January 1st and begin 2012 with a metaphorical bang. And that’s what happened. I got what I asked for. On the flip side, this means that I didn’t have my usual week or two to get adjusted while I dreamt of new visions and dreams for the year. I hadn’t realized that getting one thing would mean not having the other!
The funny thing with our desires is how clear we can be about wanting something and forgetting that it may mean less of something else. More freedom, less structure or definition or direction. More projects and contracts, less time for visioning and planning and dreaming. More wonderful relationships, less time for self…At least initially, until we adjust, understand, and create the time for our most important needs.
Might it be best not to want so much?
Well some religions certainly consider desire a problem for it is endless and insatiable. I find desire adds spark and dynamic energy to life. Not being so attached to outcomes always helps keep things in balance.
So if you have achieved or received a desire of yours and are finding yourself also struggling with it, I’d suggest giving some attention to the shift you are experiencing and making yourself aware of the transition you’re going through. You can take action in the direction you are seeking while keeping your heart connected to a sense of wholeness. What are the qualities you were wanting when you threw out that particular desire (happiness, excitement, stability, pleasure, relief, love)? Nestle into what you are now getting. Enjoy it. Revel in it. You will have less time to worry about what’s not there and instead keep moving forward into what is!
My work life has become quite full in a way I was seeking. So I’ve been missing my time for reflection, feeling, sensing, and dreaming. Pausing each day to enter this state is what helps me centre and feel fulfillment. I am pleased with the changes, but have had my temper tantrums in making them! I’m being reminded of my need to be patient and compassionate, qualities I easily forget to give myself. I’ve adapted to so many changes throughout my life (and created many of them), that I forget how much energy they require.
This weekend I allowed myself to rest, make some brushstrokes on a new canvas, write, connect with friends, enjoy a last minute opportunity to see Lalala Human Steps (it was ballet on speed!). (Note: I actually had to force myself to start, even though I love these things.) They brought me back to art and creativity where my heart gets stroked and my mind opens to more light. And slowly, I find myself feeling hopeful again, with splashes of January Joy. Just in time as we have a new moon and the Chinese new year arriving. I feel relief, knowing there is still time and space to paint in my new year. It’s not over if I haven’t figured it all out yet!! (oh, the pressures we put on ourselves.) And I must not forget that I am moving in the direction of my dreams. All is well.
Take a few moments to enter your heart and caress it in the ways only you know how. Join me in January Joy 
Tell me about your brushstrokes, dreams, inspirations, joys in the early days of 2012. Drop a comment or question to this blogpost! Sharing inspires.
Makeovers Create Confidence
January 18th, 2012 § 2 Comments
January is a great time to sift through your closet and see what needs to be thrown away and what needs to be bought as we proceed through the next months of winter. Perhaps you received some gifts of clothing over the holiday season and need to prune your closet so you can fit them in? Or better yet, it’s a new year and you’ve decided it’s time for a new look and feel both inside and out!
Whatever your motivation, I highly recommend doing a wardrobe check-up about three times a year and January is perfect.
A recent client had me work on her wardrobe cleanse and a personal shopping trip. She had planned to sort out her own closet but quickly realized that it was difficult for her to know what to throw out and what to keep. That’s a key reason why people hire professionals to come in and help.
I’ve said before that clothing carries our energy and when our closets aren’t organized and carrying the clothes that really suit and flatter us, they can feel quite heavy or draining as we open them. Working with Julie Ann was a pleasure because she was really willing to open up to something better and let go of what wasn’t working. I had to laugh as she smiled in the greatest delight every time I told her to throw something out. In fact, her exact words in those moments were, “I love you! I love you!”. Now that’s someone whose open to change and feeling good!
A style questionnaire and the wardrobe cleanse informed my pre-shopping research to find clothes that would do her far more justice than her old wardrobe and stay within her budget. She kindly agreed to let me post some before/after photos. Everytime I’ve seen her since, she’s been beaming and telling me how wonderful she feels with a wardrobe that fits and flatters and is so comfortable. She also realized that going to outlet stores isn’t always worth it. She constantly gets compliments now and people have really noticed how her new looks brings out her best.
Before styling
Before styling
Before styling
After personal styling
After personal styling
After personal styling
After personal styling
I love seeing people develop confidence and joy in who they really are. If we have but this life to be who we are now, doesn’t it deserve us being our best and loving it? Dressing well can change the most mundane or difficult activity into one that has positive energy because we choose to show up and express ourselves in and through it.
Shying away from expressing your true self is shying away from life itself. While it can appear scary and overwhelming at times, it’s still better to dress for the occasion! You just might find yourself standing there with courage, audacity, joy, and power.
The Best Resolution for a New Year
January 1st, 2012 § 6 Comments
Feeling good, or great, or fantastically wonderful.
That’s it. Keep that as your homing signal and all else will work around it to create it.
Have you ever noticed that when you feel good, it breeds more good? I was doing just that as I wrote in my journal a few days ago by looking at what was making me happy and grateful. Within a few moments, I noticed how that led to a whole list of highly creative ideas and clear action steps. And all I did was sit down and choose to do some writing.
As you feel good, you naturally attract new thoughts, ideas and create action that is in alignment with this state of being. That’s the direction to go. Whether it be tiny steps or giant leaps (i.e. go for whatever feels best, tiny is ok, it’s still moving forward), it doesn’t matter. Simple.
Well ok, it doesn’t always feel simple, but that’s natural. You’re on a new learning path to practice this state of being that is closest to your truth. And the farther away from it you’ve been living, the more uncomfortable, awkward, or strange it may initially feel. Trust me. You’ll be moving in the right direction by going to feeling good, or as I often call it, following your joy. So just keep going. It needn’t be a leap, a little hop will do just fine.
Does this mean that there won’t be any difficulty, anger, sadness, disappointment along the way? No. But once you realize that, it’s easier to accept. They’re a part of the ride and only temporary. In fact, those emotions and experiences are the information you need to re-direct your attention to that which you desire as a feeling. Sometimes feeling the anger takes us to happiness by way of realizing what we want, need or will accept. Other times disappointment leads us to change in ways we didn’t know was possible. These are our signposts. They help us keep clearing the mirror so it can reflect clarity and shine our truth back to us, which is good and joyful and real and loving.
We all want to be happy. And that in my mind is a wonderful place to aim for, and it’s closer than most of us imagine. Put it out there as your guiding light and notice how you make decisions and take action in you career, love life, relationships, dreams, endeavours. Stay in the moment. And ask, what feels good? And if you can’t get there right away, then ask, what feels better? Dancing, going for a walk, taking a time-out, reaching for a punching bag, writing it all down, saying what you really think, or turning your attention to what you love? Choose something and watch your energy, thoughts, and feelings transform. The energy of negative emotions is energy that naturally shifts and can lead to empowerment. It takes one small thought or action to move in the feeling good direction. Once you do that, you are connected to a whole chain of good feelings and experiences.
What about the stuff you left behind in order to feel good? Don’t you have to sort it out sometime? I actually used to worry about this. And then realized the answer was, “no, not really”. Funnily enough, stuff usually sorts itself out as you aim your movement in the direction of your dreams. In fact, you begin to see how much of your talk and action is superfluous!
And if you need further support on this new journey, contact me and let’s talk (There’s a reason my business is called Joi Works! It’s what I do through coaching, fitness, and personal styling.). And check out a few of my favourite inspirers: Martha Beck, Coach extraordinaire, Jeanette Maw, Good Vibe Coach and fantastic blogger, and Abraham Hicks – channelled messages that go right to the heart of things, in fact here’s an entertaining one…
This year, vow to go for feel good. And discover its power. Start right now. What feels good or better in this moment?
Meeting Icons, part 3
December 20th, 2011 § 2 Comments
At the start of the fall, I began to write about seeing and meeting with icons. Unless the remaining two weeks surprise me, I saw my my final rock star of the year at his intimate show at the Queen Elizabeth Theatre. Totally professional, smooth, and filled with personal stories, Sting graced the audience with his talent. It wasn’t the usual rock’n'roll feel, which honestly I missed, however his continued ability as a singer and songwriter was proven. My favourite was his solo finale of “Message in a Bottle“, sitting in the spotlight, just him and his guitar – incredible. It even recorded well on my iPhone, it was so clear!
The most unusual part of this event for me was how grounded I felt at the end of the concert. It was a healthy enjoyment rather than an adrenaline-filled high, which is more common in my experience. My sense is that it has a lot to do with who this man, Sting, is when he’s not performing and being a rock star. He shows his realness. He expresses his vulnerability. He knows there is so much more to life than the illusion of stardom. He shared with us his three favourite subjects: music, sex, and religion. 
Needing a dose of his beauty, I purchased an autographed CD (pictured above) and a cheeky t-shirt. Ah, what fun!
And last but not least, a couple of months ago, I went to see The Human League in concert at the small Rickshaw Theatre on East Hastings. It initially seemed an odd venue, but ended up being perfect as we got to be upfront and close to the band. Coming from Sheffield, England, the Human League became popular in the 80s with their world hit “Don’t You Want Me Baby“. While I liked them back then and sang along to that song like everyone else, this time I fell in love with them. Their ability to present their material years later with the energy of being here now (that is with passion, love, presence) was incredible. Their older songs certainly lasted the decades they’ve lived. And their new material was just as fabulous. They were also dressed to perform, looking more gorgeous than they did before in my opinion. The audience loved them and they loved us back by their fabulous show.
We are all stars when we let our light shine. Spending time with other stars, we can remember we all come from the same stardust whether we operate in small spheres of the world or large. It can be fun and delightful to place all this star power on others, as I seem to love to do at times, but we will be most fed when we receive their message to shine our own.
So, perhaps you, like me, will want to look at how you can be your own star in 2012. And for that, the right wardrobe is a must. Off to check mine…!
